


Something Always Brings Me Back to You

by queenlevana



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I don't know why this is so depressing in the beginning I'm so sorry, I just had a lot of Willie thoughts, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:09:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27675182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenlevana/pseuds/queenlevana
Summary: Willie questions his existence and his relationship with Alex.Or, the Willex reunion from Willie's point of view.
Relationships: Alex & Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Alex/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Caleb Covington & Willie
Comments: 14
Kudos: 219





	Something Always Brings Me Back to You

It was early in the morning, before the sun had even risen, and Willie was sitting on the same bench where he’d had his first conversation with Alex. He wasn't sure why he'd decided to come here specifically - he told himself it was to skate down the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and so he wore his helmet and brought his skateboard along, but he knew he was just fooling himself. He hadn’t skated since three days ago, when he’d left Alex behind.

It was silly, Willie kept telling himself, to hope that if he looked around the corner he’d see the blonde-haired boy walking towards him, hands in his pockets and a nervous but hopeful look on his face. But Willie wanted it so badly that it ached in the place where his heart should be. He wanted to see Alex’s eyes light up when they met his own, and for the corners of his mouth to turn up slightly, and for him to say something stupid that made Willie laugh, and to believe that they’d be alright.

It wasn’t fair. But since when had Willie known fair? It wasn’t fair that the driver that’d hit him had survived and lived a full life, while Willie existed as only a shell of his former self. It wasn’t fair that he’d given all his trust to Caleb, the man he saw as a father, only for him to abuse it just like everyone Willie had known when he was alive had done. It wasn’t fair that he’d finally gotten a chance with Alex, and…and the worst part was, Willie wasn’t even sure if it was real.

He recalled that night at the Hollywood Ghost Club, when Alex had spoken about Caleb, “I knew I recognized him. He’s the guy that bumped into me outside the Orpheum.” It was a statement said in passing, not one made to be especially important, and yet it had hit Willie hard. Alex had met Caleb before he’d met Willie. And knowing what Caleb was capable of, did he arrange for Willie to run into Alex that fateful day?

Willie desperately clung to the idea that his relationship with Alex had occurred naturally. That it wasn’t all perfectly arranged, like a game of chess where they were pawns, only useful so long as Caleb needed them, and when he was done they’d be sacrificed. Willie knew he was letting Caleb get in his head. But all his life Willie had been manipulated. He was always a tool for someone else to get what they wanted, whether it was his dad using him for sympathy, or his mom using him for child support, or, well, he could go on. He was an asteroid caught constantly in everyone else’s gravity, with no abilities to attract anyone back to him.

He took a deep breath and screamed. He yelled like it was all he had left in him, but when he stopped the pain didn’t go away, and then he was sobbing, clutching desperately to his skateboard and realizing that after everything he’d been through, it was his relationship with Alex that had broken him. He cried as the sun rose in the sky, lighting up everything around him but leaving Willie in the shadow of the building behind him, like he didn’t deserve the fresh start of a new day. He wondered if he’d be stuck like this forever, in limbo in a world that never cared for him and never would, despite all his attempts to change that.

Willie didn’t know how long he sat there like that. Eventually the tears had subsided, and there was only the numbness left, but he still didn’t move. He wondered after a while if Caleb would come looking for him, but he didn’t care enough about any consequences to try and collect himself. Soon enough, people started coming out onto the streets, and just as Willie had predicted, life moved on. He looked up and watched everyone move around him, Willie at the center like the eye of a hurricane that nobody could reach.

But there was a head moving towards him, forcing his way through, his golden hair gleaming in the sun, and Willie blinked, wondering if he was hallucinating. No, there was the unmistakable bright pink sweatshirt with a fanny pack tied around it, and socks with little red hearts on them that his pants were tucked into. It was Alex, and he was suddenly right in front of Willie, and they were staring at each other in disbelief.

And then Alex’s arms were around Willie’s, clinging tightly like the boy would vanish if he let go. Willie held on just as desperately at first, relief bubbling in him as he realized that Alex had fought to survive and won. Yet Willie suddenly found himself pulling away, forcing distance between them.

Alex looked shocked. “Why…what’s wrong?” he asked.

“I can’t do this. I don’t know if…Caleb might…How am I supposed to know we’ll be okay? I can’t risk it. I’m terrified, Alex.” The words were pouring out of Willie uncontrollably, and he couldn’t stop it. “I need you, Alex, but is it worth it?”

Alex stepped closer, removing the gap between them that Willie had created. “Of course it’s worth it. I’m sure of that, and I’m never sure of anything.” He laughed at this, but when Willie didn’t smile back, he stopped. 

“I won’t let myself be the reason you’re always hurt,” Willie declared. He forced himself to believe this was a rational decision. “If Caleb comes after you again, it’ll be my fault-“

“No.” Alex cut him off. “It’ll be Caleb’s fault. Willie, everything you did for us, for me, was only you trying to help. You can’t blame yourself for that.”

“But I-“

“I need you too. Why do you think I came back here? I’ve been looking for you for days.”

Days. Days Willie had spent hiding in the Hollywood Ghost Club, before this morning when he’d felt like he was suffocating, despite not needing air. This whole time, Alex had been looking for _him_.

Alex reached up and lifted Willie’s helmet off his head, setting it down on the ground. He put his hands on Willie’s face, and his touch was warm and gentle as he wiped away the tears Willie hadn’t even noticed had begun falling again. Willie leaned into the touch, giving up the defenses he’d placed around himself when he first let go of Alex.

“Hey. It’ll be alright,” Alex whispered, and there it was, that flicker of hope inside Willie that Alex ignited whenever he was around.

“Don’t leave again. Not without me,” Willie begged.

“I won’t. I promise.”


End file.
